After careful research and ponderance, the latest:
Crop Circles: All fake, get over it. I mean, really.
Big Foot: Maybe. Lots of fakes...we can only hope; but don't wager your youngest child.
UFOs: Oh hell yes. Look to the skies. And bring a camera.
Rods: No. Video vagary.
Zombies: Yes, if my neighbors count.
Nessie: Probably not, that water is cold, man.
Champ: See Nessie.
Chupacabra: No. Mangy mutant dogs.
Mothman: Let's hope not--seriously creepy.
Giant snakes, bears, arachnids: Yup. Nature is really pissed at us.
Gators in the sewers: I wish. They're in the backyard pond.
Ghosts: Lots of weirdness out there, but no. Residual phenomena for sensitives.
Vampires, werewolves, etc: No. Just deluded wannabees looking for that 15 minutes.
Area 51: It's there, but sorry, no saucers and aliens. The government likes to pretend they're hiding something.
Hangar 17: See Area 51.
Toejam: Sadly, yes.
Sex after 50: Sadly, no.
Funny new sitcom: No.
Fusion power in my lifetime: No.
Fusion power in your lifetime: No.
Trip to Mars in my lifetime: Pleasepleaseplease...now that would be cool.
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